Drunken Pests

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Who here thinks the Monday after the Super Bowl should be a national holiday? With over 1.5 million Americans projected to call in sick today, there are definite grounds for support of the movement. We all need a day to recover from last night’s festivities; to unwind, and cleanup the mess that has been made. While you’re sifting through stale chips and several opened bottles of beer today, your first reaction would be to throw them away, but we say no. Instead you can save them, and make a simple pest-trap for any unwanted critters that show up to the party late.

Here’s a pest control secret—pests love beer, especially cockroaches. If you take a rag, soak it in the flat beer you have left over, and leave the rag out overnight, cockroaches will come and party. In the morning, you can simply pick up the rag and throw them away; they will still be drunk/hungover from the night, and they won’t be able to scurry away. Similarly, if you take an empty jar, coat the rim with Vaseline, throw a few leftovers at the bottom, and pour some beer in, it’ll be an irresistible trap for them. The Vaseline will stop the roaches from crawling out, so you can put the lid on and dispose them as you see fit.

Are those bananas on the counter starting to turn brown? Are you starting to see some fruit flies fly above your fruit bowl? All you need to do is take the half-empty bottle of beer, tape a piece of paper on top and poke a hole in it, and you have yourself a makeshift fly trap. Fruit flies love beer, and the paper will prevent them from getting back out. In no time, you’ll clear the air of fruit flies, and have an entire bottle filled with buzzed flies.

Finally, what’s better than all-natural insect repellent, made from ingredients you already have on hand? If you mix together a cup of flat beer, epson salt, mouthwash, and half a package of dry yeast, you have homemade insect repellent. Feel free to spray that around the house, and the critters will be no more.

As the saying goes, “One man’s trash is another pest’s treasure”. The cleanup that will ensue today doesn’t all have to go to waste, as it can be used for some homemade pest preventers. With all that cleaning and pest prevention to do, you have a lot on your plate.

So go ahead, call out sick and enjoy your unofficial holiday; we won’t tell.

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